So there she blows, our final Sussex derby of the season – the 10th we’ve had in the league this season. We definitely won’t be getting as many next year.

Hastings and Bognor have stunk the place out and are southward bound. And there’s a small chance that both Horsham and Chichester could go too, if Horsham top the table and Chichester squeak into the play-offs. If Burgess Hill fail to win promotion from the South-East, Whitehawk may be our only derby next season. Deep unbridled joy.

Mind you, if we don’t have to go back to Chichester again in a hurry, I wouldn’t be drastically upset. The city’s smashing with plenty of good pubs, albeit the one we visited just before kick-off seemed to be holding a Morris dancer convention. It caught me somewhat by surprise when the bloke standing next to me at the urinal started jingling.

“You should see the doctor about that, mate,” I told him.

“Sod off,” he replied. What a bell end.

The Morris dancers were about as welcoming as Chichester’s ground. It’s basically a 3G training pitch with a couple of Wimpey Homes stuck on the side. I’ve eaten bran flakes with more character.

I think the players caught the training-ground vibe, because the first half was played like a practice match. No intensity, no spark, no shots for the entire half. At half-time, we were lucky to be only trailing by one, a shot from the edge of the box that we gave Lloyd Rowlatt all the time in the world to pop into the bottom corner.

Pitts must have dusted off his copy of The Riot Act at half-time, because we were much better in the second period. Calvin Ekpiteta and Paris Muirhead were hooked for Shay Hutchinson and Alfie Allen, and they were at least willing to risk a nosebleed by getting into the opposition box.

Alas, five minutes into the second half we were two down, and Chichester didn’t need to get anywhere near our box to score. Lewis Rustell spotted Toby Bull off his line and tried a cheeky lob from 40 yards which just about dipped under the crossbar. Fantastic finish, to be fair.

Their third came from a long throw, which was headed on to the post before Clarke banged home the rebound.

We kept going, dinked the post from a Bobby Unwin snapshot, but the damage was done. Derbies – not all they’re cracked up to be, are they?

Lewes: Bull, Warren, Meeres, Spinks, Ojemen, Muirhead (Allen), Sablier, Antonio (Finney), Unwin (Ladapo), Ekpiteta (Hutchinson), Bassett.

Sub not used: Jones

Supporters Club man of the match: Shae Hutchinson only came on at half-time, but he instantly added the threat that was absent in the first half.