Lewes 2 vs Margate 0: You can’t beat it

We’re at that stage of the season where things are beginning to run out: games, barrels of Harvey’s, patience.

Indeed, we were practically panic-buying patience when a drummer rocked up in the Terry Parris End at the start of the game. You could barely hear yourself grumble!

Now, of course, Lewes FC is the very seat of democracy, second only to North Korea. (I’ve got North Korea’s lawyers on line one – Ed.) So I conducted a quick straw poll of the fans to find out whether they would welcome drummers at men’s games. Let’s just say the results were conclusive:

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On the pitch, things were much more positive. Margate away was this season’s best performance to date, when we went up there and Tannered their backsides 6-2. This performance didn’t quite hit those heights, but it wasn’t miles off, either.

With Ollie still nursing an injury, it was Razz and Dalling who were flying down the wings and both were superb.

Dalling had a very presentable early chance to put us in front, after some stunning build-up work. Dalling exchanged passes with Brad Pritchard and The Bastard before bearing down on goal with only the keeper to beat. Perhaps he was put off by Phil Collins in the stands, but the shot was tame.

Dalling needed to be more clinical, more Bastard-like. And thus it was The Bastard who put us ahead – from a corner of all things!

If this one came off the training ground, I’ll have some of what the set-piece coach has been smoking. The ball was looped high to the back-pedalling Salmon at the far post, who headed it back across goal to Nelson. The skipper then surprised everyone by heading the ball upwards to himself, before nodding it into Taylor’s path at the second attempt. The Bastard tucked it away, like all good bastards do, with only 12 minutes on the clock – much to the delight of one loyal fan.

Deaksy’s buying the first round on Saturday. No spirits.

The Rooks were playing Rolls Royce football, knocking the ball around the pitch like kings. That’s not to say Margate didn’t have their chances, though. Their nippy little number 9 got in behind on more than one occasion, with Carey and the post preventing him from making our night more uncomfortable than living next door to our very own Keith Moon.

Still, it was nothing less than we deserved when Razz doubled the lead, and he did it in typical Razz style. Juevan Spencer slipped a lovely ball through the middle for Razz who cut inside and slammed it in the top-left corner of the goal. Off he raced for a cuddle with Tony, who probably just needed the warmth after sitting on that cool box all night.

We could have made it three, four or more with chances either spurned or well saved, but let’s not gripe. Three points puts us back in the play-off spots, thanks to Horsham twotting Folkestone, and suddenly the promotion chase is very much back on.

It’s squeaky bum time. That’s bum, not drum. Got it, kid?

Lewes: Carey, Spencer, Salmon, Nelson, Yao, Maloney, Pettit, Pritchard, Coleman De-Graft, Dalling, Taylor

Subs: Addy, Hall, Phipp, Olukoga, Klass

Video highlights: